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Jesse David & Taylor Mom

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About Jesse David & Taylor Mom

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    Jesse David's & Taylor's Mom

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  • Angel Date
    Jesse David 8/2/84-10/10/12; Taylor James 6/25/87-8/87

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  1. Loss of an Adult Child

    Elisabeth Kubler Ross
  2. Loss of an Adult Child

    Hello All, it has been awhile since I have posted. My mom is still recovering for her heart failure and stent procedure...she is doing better than the doctors anticipated. It did throw me for a huge loop, and it seemed like the grief with Jesse just loomed so large....like the finality of it all was staring me in the face. Also, my dad, who was not the nicest person while I was growing up, was really acting up. Just made a horrible situation that much worse. I am now able to step back a bit and get my bearings but it brought up a lot of childhood trauma that I had packed away. Very deep. I am adding a link to Carol Kearn's web site. She is a grief counselor who was mentored by Elisabeth Kubler-Ross directly. She was also first on site during the Connecticut school shootings in 2012. Her daughter Krissy died of drowning in the 1970s so this was partly her grief journey and also has some experiences in it from her clients later on. I was fortunate to touch base with her via email in 2012 and I was sent an Elisabeth Kubler-Ross butterfly from Carol. I didn't know at the time what it was/represented, but as I read about Elisabeth Kubler-Ross, I understood the significance of it. http://www.carolkearns.com/kristens-legacy/overview.html Wishing everyone a peaceful evening.
  3. Loss of an Adult Child

    In Answer to Colleen, I am posting a blog written from someone who is at 19 years. This posting is mostly for those longer in the journey. https://bereavedparentsblog.wordpress.com/2018/01/09/once-a-mom-always-a-mom/ Tommy's mom, yes it was shocking at the treatment we recieved, especially my daughter. Gretchen, your artwork was beautiful. Sandy, thanks for the compliment on Jesse's pic Niques mom, I am sorry for the loss of your dear daughter...this is a loving place. Kate, thanks for the encouragement. My mom is just resting from the procedure...is doing ok.
  4. Loss of an Adult Child

    Thanks for all the replies....it is a tough journey. This crisis with my mom makes me realize how far different my world is now. I am pretty wiped out tonight so am going to bed early.
  5. Loss of an Adult Child

    I also have found relaxing nature videos to be helpful such as the one I am posting below
  6. Loss of an Adult Child

    Hearthurt, I wanted to respond to your post, "You are right...people are plain nasty....until IT happens to them! I am so pissed off about this jerk spreading rumors about me, I feel like leaving home. It is bad enough to be grieving like this, but to be laid bare for veiled attacks when my wife and I are dealing with this loss makes this much, much worse." My advice is to be very very careful who you let into your inner circle of loss. Usually unless the person has had child loss they haven't a clue what they are talking about. Myself and my family have suffered a lot of attacks from those who were in our church at the time...we left 2 churches because the people could not stop judging and pointing fingers and accusing. At first there was sympathy, afterwards followed was a flogging. It would be an understatement to say I am entirely pissed off at those who try to gain spiritual brownie points at my family's worse time ever... And those people are such incredible big liars, especially to themselves...we actually had one family exile my daughter because we did not practice the "forgiveness plan" they mapped out for us! (I think they forget to read the psalms and some of what King David said at his low points). I would say to find those who practice true spirituality...oddly enough, we have switched over to a local parish in Marshfield WI leaving protestant churches behind. Also, going to the prayer room at Holy Hill was helpful and lighting candles there. I would encourage you to look at the mystics of the church (Padre Pio) and others such as Rhoda Wise (stigmatic). I have found there is an inner mystical path that seems to be the core and not everyone that is an attender understands that, or even knows that it exists. I am sharing a pic for you and those who like to finger point at the bereaved.... ******************************* Thank you to both Dee and to Kate who emailed me this morning! ...it has been a difficult few weeks. My mom suffered from almost having a heart attack so I have been with her since Dec 29. She had stints placed and still may need other heart surgery. It was touch-and-go for awhile. I had a somewhat precognitive dream beforehand, as well as other certain knowings that manifested that something was going to drop. So far she is recovering good from the stints but time will tell if that relieves the pressure on heart valves. What I have learned is to watch the salt intake!!!! No more than 2000 mg a day. I have been doing a variety of simple recipes for her to get her back to the basics. ***************************************** To those new here, I am sorry for your loss. It is a great group of people that meet here and have helped me immensely. Hello to all my fellow posters. I thank you all for being there.
  7. Loss of an Adult Child

  8. Loss of an Adult Child

    Hello to all. I have thought about everyone here on the forum knowing how difficult the start of a new year can be. To all New members here, I’m sorry for your loss, it is a very difficult journey. However this group of people has helped me in more ways than could be known. Kate thank you for sharing the story of your mom and dad. Susan I hope your health Tests doing well . Dee thanks for asking about me. I wanted to share about a woman ...I viewed her videos today. Her name is Maria dancing heart. One in particular stood out to me on how to avoid burnout. Some suggestions she said was to have some meditation space ...walks in nature and also to use essential oil such as frankincense. She said that particular oil is good for depression. It is very easy to not take care of oneself when one is carrying a very heavy load. This morning I sat looking out a window and noticed the full moon. I listen to my divine mercy chaplet and just had some quiet time. It was much needed after such a busy month in December. I will probably post again later As I am so far behind in reading. Sending gentle thoughts to all.
  9. Loss of an Adult Child

    Kate, you will like the song, as I thought of Jeff to when I viewed it. Dee, I am sorry for your friend...does she have assistance in her family? Lesley, thanks for your posting above...there are many who I miss their input here.....this place has been a lifeline for me and the kindness of everyone here. Susan, I love the picture of your John David, one of favorites! Dianne, good to see your post! My time has been somewhat limited as both my jobs are taking up more time than I expected....I will be glad once December is over!
  10. Loss of an Adult Child

    Thinking of everyone as we are missing our beloved ones. I am including a link below to a beautiful song. Something Jesse would have liked. Homeless man plays beautiful song with powerful message https://youtu.be/FhgZ4hBGJkY?t=28s (could not get the video to embed...so follow the link)
  11. Loss of an Adult Child

    Thinking of you Kate on Jeff's angel date. May you and Ross find gentleness in the day.
  12. Loss of an Adult Child

    Susan, sending healing thoughts to you for your upcoming medical tests. Sending lots of hugs. Ayanna's mom, congratulations on the new book of poems from your daughter! It is a beautiful legacy. Tina, I think being in the first three years, most of my time was spent in a fog. For me, I believe it was about the 4 year along I could focus on really anything. Have to run...sending love to all.
  13. Loss of an Adult Child

    Thanks Leah, Dee, Georgina and Kate for the well-wishes on Benton. It is a tremendous relief. Kate, if you can, post the Christmas tree pic. Susan, are you okay? Miss your posts. Dianne, sending gentle thoughts. Leah, I know how hard it is. Are any of the grandchildren over at 16 years old? They may be able to opt for emancipation. here is a link http://www.crckids.org/child-support/child-emancipation/
  14. Loss of an Adult Child

    For you Georgina,
  15. Loss of an Adult Child

    Tina, I am sorry for the way your niece treated you. A grief counselor said, that too only keep those people in your life that will truly be in your corner. The body is already under trauma, and these types of attacks you need to protect yourself against. Prayers for a new job. I too left my job after I lost my son. Prayers. Thanks Kate for your response and for Dee too. I am taking vitamins still, and do the practice of grounding as recommended by my mom. (where you stand out on bare ground with your bare feet, only on warm days now! ) Dr. Bernie Siegel had some good recommendations for self - care in his video. Susan, you okay out there? Georgina, I am sorry not many remembered James Birthday. My daughter and I always thought how handsome he is and how much he looks like your hubby.