Jeff's Mom

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About Jeff's Mom

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  1. Thank you Dee for your beautifully worded and eloquent posts. You are a port in a storm for all of us and offer such comfort to a hurting heart. Susan, your Veto is already breaking hearts. That smile of his is heart melting for sure. I really love seeing sand sculptures. That was so beautifully done and very involved. We have a competition every August long weekend in Gimli. It blows my mind how intricate they are getting each year. So much fun to watch them making them. Sherry, I'm sorry you are having so much trouble with your computer these days. Does it have anything to do with the lines outside? I always feel so cut off when ours is down. Dianne, thinking of you and hoping your day will be slightly more peaceful. Becky, what a beautiful poem. It is so good to see you on the site again. I hope you will continue to share more of your work with us. Wade, as always it is good to hear from you. You have have been missed! Hang on with both hands. It looks like a sunny day today, but still really cool for this time of year. I can't believe how quickly the month has passed . Time to pick up the Cancer Daffodil Pins today and make the rounds. I am sending love and "HUGS" to everyone. Georgina...let us know how you are doing. Sandy...hope all is well your way. Kate
  2. I first checked out this site not long after Jeff died. I was in far too much pain to even think that I could relate or participate. I even felt that here nobody would understand my pain. It was as if I was living in a horrible nightmare that I desperately wanted to wake up from. I walked away for a time. I thought I could handle it on my own. What I learned was that this load was far too heavy to carry on my own. I came back to the site. Here I found understanding and kindness that I can not begin to put into words. We are all brought together in this by a horrible connection. One of our children has been taken from us and our hearts are shattered. We come from all walks of life. We are united by understanding the true nature of each others pain and loss. We have disagreements from time to time. That is the nature of things. We know we can count on each other for support when we are at our lowest. Many thanks to everyone that has been there for me over these very difficult seven years. Sometimes words are not enough to show gratitude. Thanks to ALL!
  3. Life is an opportunity, benefit from it. Life is beauty, admire it. Life is a dream, realize it. Life is a challenge, meet it. Life is a duty, complete it. Life is a game, play it. Life is a promise,fulfill it. Life is sorrow, overcome it. Life is a song, sing it. Life is a struggle, accept it. Life is tragedy, confront it. Life is an adventure, dare it. Life is luck, make it. Life is life, fight for it. Mother Theresa
  4. Bob, you are a boorish prat. Irrespective of nationality... baseless ignorance is best left to fester in the minds of those that are unable to carry on a civil discussion rather than resorting to name calling. Your comment to Susan the other day was rude and uncalled for! Show some respect for the people of this site. You have been pushing buttons for ages. I hope they bring your son's killer to justice and then you can move ahead with your life in a positive way. Clearly you have an issue with Canadians. Your problem.
  5. Oh Becky, what a cheerful celebration in honor of your son. I'm sorry you had another fall. Please do be careful and take care. Laurie, no I did not get your reply. You are very welcome. We are off for yet another check-up late today. That eye surgery he had in November that appeared successful did not go as well as we had hoped and it is back again. Another surgery planned I imagine. He goes for yet another colonoscopy and more blood work soon. It's like living with a hand grenade with the pin pulled in your hand. Just waiting for it to drop. If you remember they told him if it comes back they can't help him. So, every check-up is an anxious time. I will pm you later today.
  6. Bullying hurts Bob. You said that your son bullied people and you did not see the harm in that. It was harmful to whoever he did it too. You appear to get a rise out of shaking things up a bit. Kinda sad actually. I'll tell you who I husband. Diagnosed with end stage three colon cancer four years ago. Had a ton of his colon removed and underwent months of really difficult chemo. He had a pic line placed and dragged a line and pump with him for the duration of his chemo treatments. Not one complaint. Not one. Always upbeat and smiled without finding fault in his circumstances. Good friend of mine had her son who is a pilot with the Air Force was deployed into a dangerous place and he is definitely not complaining about the damp and trees. Good luck to you. You appear to need it.
  7. Lou Ann, I saw that on the National last night. Poor little tyke. Behind a church... or parking lot by a church? Hope they catch whoever did this. I just wanted to say that when I mentioned yesterday that it is important to let go of anger that I was in no way trying to diminish the horrible loss that people have suffered. While I know that anger is natural at the beginning... it can become like a disease after a while and eat us alive. It is definitely soul destroying. After a time we can use it as a crutch and we can not move forward in a positive way. We then become bitter and filled with misery. Bob, I hope they find who did this to your son. I also hope that you will try to find another therapist that you can relate to in a better way. I hope you will be able to ditch the recreational drugs and stick to those that have been prescribed by your Doc. There is a softer side to you I am sure. That is the side that your new grandson will hopefully be a part of. Good luck.
  8. Susan, will you just look at the smile on that little doll, What a cutie pie.
  9. HAPPY BIRTHDAY, JARED, Becky, thinking of you today on this special day as you remember that wonderful day your sweet young man came into your life. Beautiful pictures. Thanks for sharing.
  10. As I said...your choice. We each have to choose our own path.
  11. Suffice to say that I don't think any of us have not been given a lot on our plate to deal with. Life is certainly not a walk through the tulips. I, too...can count more difficulties in my own life than I will mention on the site. I find that when I am at my lowest I look no further than to others that are giving it their best shot to rise above their adversity. The level of courage that some people show can often bring me to tears. One young man was interviewed on the radio within the past few months that suffered a spinal cord injury. He level of optimism defined reason. Yet that kid was determined not to let himself sink into a place of no return. Given his determination he has defied all medical prognosis and is starting to improve. Go figure. The positive mind can work miracles. I have a friend that has now died that had a daughter that suffered a major stroke in her early thirties. They said she would never be able to go home. Well, "the hell with it" she said...she is now driving her own car that HAS BEEN OUTFITTED for her disability. She volunteers with other stroke victims. She has lost herself in helping others and is now remarried and living a happy life. Miracles do happen. You have to dig deep down within to rid yourself of your inner anger and hatred. Let go of animosities and let life fall into place. Nobody said it was easy. We have to challenge ourselves daily to face our trials. Sometimes we succeed and sometimes we fail...or appear too. But the only failure is in NOT trying.
  12. Lou Ann, my point is that you must not stuff the memories down. We need to find the strength to face them slowly with help... and then using the tools we build... we learn to move forward. I do not push that night away. I have just learned after a long time that I try very hard to focus on more positive memories. I know that is the way he would want it for us. I love the fact that they are speaking out. I wish they were here to give them a huge HUG! Tommy's Mom...I agree completely. Using your celebrity status to make positive change is a valuable and worthwhile cause. Their mother would be so very proud of am I.
  13. Becky, changing the speed limits and signs are a really helpful way to bring about positive change in safety for those travelling on those roads. Good for you! Awesome pictures of Jared as well! How is your eye doing? Hopefully it is starting to heal nicely. I am so sorry to hear about the tragic accident and death of your friends. As far as being with our child at the exact time of their death...well, as a parent we all want to be with them to the end. As we all know that is not always the case. It can be very traumatizing to witness their passing. My husband and I are still pushing that night back in our head. My husband still feels him take his last breath as he passed away while doing CPR. It was just horrible. We focus on the wonderful memories that we have of him over his years and try to push that horrible night into the background. You can never really process it properly... and so why try? Just know that Jared is now in a awesome place of peace and love. I am beyond proud of the Royals and Lady Gaga for coming forward and openly lifting that veil of secrecy from the stigma that surrounds mental health issues regarding depression. After all, who has not over their life time suffered in some way... but was afraid to speak up for fear of being considered weak, or not quite up to snuff. This can be a time for huge change to take place. Why not now? When could it be a better time? People need to know that there is help out there and they do not need to face ridicule and shame if they do seek it. I hope that this cause that they are pushing will only continue to grow with support from those that will gain the courage when they see they are not alone. Strength comes in numbers after all! We are enjoying a beautiful sunny day today. I can't wait for that lake to warm up to be able to walk along the shore in my bare feet. Wishing you all a truly peaceful day. Love to All, Kate
  14. Well done, Harry, William and Kate. It's about time that people started to speak up openly about depression. It's about time that people broke down these walls of ignorance. It takes courage and strength to be the first to step up to the plate. Maybe now the next generation will not be as stigmatized about talking openly of their feelings. Kudos to you all!
  15. Thanks Susan for the ideas. All really good and helpful ways to stay healthy. Do you find that the cranberry tablets have you running to the bathroom at night? I think I'll print out your post.