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Online Grief Support, Help for Coping with Loss | Beyond Indigo Forums
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karla1842

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Everything posted by karla1842

  1. H

    I am so sorry for your loss.
  2. I don't like my house now my best friend gone

    Awww, what a beautiful friend. I am so sorry for your loss!
  3. I am so very sorry for your loss. My thoughts and prayers are with you. I hope you are able to find comfort and support from family and friends.
  4. Just found out

    I'm so sorry about your mom. This is such a difficult situation. My dad knew he was going to die and made a decision for no more treatments. It was painful for us to accept, but it was his decision. He didn't want to drag out the inevitable and was very concerned about what his situation would be later on if he were to "try" different treatments. My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family as you try to cope.
  5. I'm all done now

    Happy New Year to you too. I'm starting off the new year with mixed emotions. I have a new kitten but my son is deployed as of today. I'm tired.
  6. I'm all done now

    I'm glad my story helped you. :-)
  7. I'm all done now

    Oh I so hope my older cats make it that long!! :-)
  8. Christmas Angel

    I truly do understand what you are experiencing. Christmas seems to be a time of loss for my family too. I had brother die on December 23 many years ago. My daughter-in-law was 16 weeks pregnant and had a miscarriage two years ago Christmas Eve. My daughter had a miscarriage Christmas Eve this year. Everyone else's joy this time of year just magnifies the pain.
  9. Holiday Schmoliday

    Awww. So true.
  10. I'm so sorry about the loss of your mother. However difficult it is to accept your father's relationship with another woman, it is his personal business and if I were you, I'd wait for him to bring it up. If it is a serious relationship then he will eventually let you know about it. If it isn't, then he may never bring her up. And, it's possible if he was having an affair that your mother knew about it since they were together in a not-so-happy relationship. Either way, I'd wait for him to bring it up. He probably spent the evening wondering what you saw on his phone and may say something to you about it soon. Good luck and try not to let the stress and your imagination tear you to pieces.
  11. I'm all done now

    Aww AJWcat, I'm so sorry for your loss. I never used to think about my pets dying until I lost two in two weeks. Now I still have 15 year old and a 16 year old cats and reality has hit me that they may not be around too much longer.
  12. Older brother died (1/2 siblings here)

    I'm so sorry for your loss.
  13. I'm all done now

    Maria, thank you for the kind words. I can't get over the guilt yet. I took my other cats to the vet immediately to get them checked for Leukemia and my 15 year old black tom cat, Chuck, has it. Knowing he has it, they can now be very proactive should he get sick. I don't let Chuck out anymore so I can keep a closer eye on him. He's content and looking really good so I like to think at least something good came out of his brother's death.
  14. I'm all done now

    Robbie-I have strays too and I've been feeding them and taking care of them. I don't bring them in because i have indoor cats, but for some reason I feel like maybe they are Stinker's friends coming to check on me. :-)
  15. My father LOVED Christmas. It was the highlight of the entire year as far as he was concerned and everything in our life seemed to always revolve around Christmas. Unfortunately, one year when I was about 14 my brother was killed in a car wreck December 23. From that point on we all had to watch dad fall apart for days on end every year around Christmas. It was all very unpleasant and most of us came to just hate Christmas. The year dad died, we all made our obligatory visit to Mom's house and that day we decided we would all do something new to help us get through the holidays. I now treat myself to a new book or something and don't do anything elaborate around the holidays (no decorations, fancy food, etc). I usually volunteer to work and it has helped eliminate that feeling of dread every year as the month of December approaches. Try treating yourself to something unusual around the holidays (like a mini-vacation) or something to try to give yourself something to look forward too as everyone else is celebrating.
  16. horrible guilt and shame

    Omgosh, I lost two of cats within two weeks of each other from something similar. Della, 10 years old, and Stinker 13 years old, both had FIV and Leukemia and I had no idea. It's been 4 months and I'm still mad at myself over not knowing and grieving for the loss of two of my beautiful cats.
  17. Dust, I recently lost a cat that was much more to me than just a pet. I had him for 13 years and he got me through some of the worst times of my life. I'd like to think I'd see him again and I try not to dwell on what if I don't. I just don't know.
  18. I'm all done now

    I'm so sorry to hear about your loss. I lost my beloved cat, Stinker, 4 months ago and I'm still beating myself up over it. He was 13 years old and an absolutely beautiful, big (22 lbs) black and white cat with a real personality. He loved being outside more than anything so I let him roam most days and during the spring/summer he would not come home for days on end. I would always see him around the neighborhood and all my neighbors loved him too. He got me through some of the worst times of my life-loss of parents, children in trouble, loss of a job I loved, etc. I was able to focus on him for a while each day and he took my mind off so many problems. We had a little routine where I'd let him out in the mornings and then sit on the porch step and wait for him to come home each evening. To make a long 13 year story short, I never knew he had contracted Leukemia during his roaming around throughout the years. I still don't know why his vet never discovered it but I just need to stop focusing on it. My Stinker disappeared for a few weeks earlier this summer and I thought for sure he had wandered into the state park and gotten killed. I checked the road several times a day to see if he had been hit by a car. One afternoon while coming home from work, I spotted him on a neighbors porch and picked him up and took him home. He had lost a lot of weight and I thought it was because he hadn't been coming home to eat. I was so relieved to have him back that I vowed not to let him out anymore. Three days after he got home I found him on the bathroom floor unable to get up. I took him straight to the vet and was told he had been attacked by something and had picked up an infection and they couldn't help him because he was too sick. I found out at that time he had Leukemia and his body couldn't fight an infection. He died an hour later and I totally blame myself for not being attentive enough to him. I'm saying all this because I understand your loss. I could not eat, sleep or work for days. I sat on my porch for days just staring into the street like I had been doing for years waiting for him to come home. Weeks later, I cried every time I thought about him. All this being said, again, I'm so sorry for your loss. It helped me not to think about anything other than the day at hand and not how I was going to get through the future.
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