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    • ModKonnie

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      Hi all,  I'm sure you've noticed some changes in the forums. We've again had to do some updates, so that's why things may look a little different. Nothing major should have changed.  Also, we are going to start adding advertisements sensitive to our community on the boards. This is something we are experimenting with, and we will certainly make sure they are in the best interests of everyone. We want to make sure our forums continue to stay accessible and cost free to all of our members, and this is a way to ensure this.  If you have any questions or comments, please feel free to privately message me or email me at Konnie@beyondindigo.com.  As always, we will be here with you, ModKonnie


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About reginagreene

  • Rank
    Regina Greene
  • Birthday 12/16/1969

Profile Information

  • Gender
  • Interests
    I am a mother , wife , daughter , sister, aunt, friend,, I love reading books.. watching movies.. and favorite show is WIPEOUT,,
  • Loss Type
  • Angel Date


  • Occupation
    Truck Driver
  • Last Name
  • First Name
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  • About Me
    I loved my life, before my brother committed suicide now I am in continual state of loss.
  1. How do i ______ on the forums?

    I am sorry but I went to my post How do I forgive and I can not find my original post anywhere,, I was wondering what happened to it,, please help me locate it,, It may sound silly but I need to read it to see for my self what if any progress I truly have made,, thanks..
  2. how do i forgive

    my original thread is missing from the topic,, can you please find it for me,, thanks..
  3. Im about to give.

    I am so sorry for your loss . I know about not feeling like people remember the one that is gone. My family doesn't like to talk about my brothers suicided. so I have to talk mainly on here about how I feel. if you want the whole story its under the suicide forum How do i forgive is the title.. In my family we do talk about him but don't dare mention his form of death.. I hope that this site helps you as much as it has me. I had noone till I found this forum. God bless and you are not alone,,, we are out here and we will never forget those that have gone on.
  4. first christmas

    I am sorry for your loss. and it is hard.. I am having a hard one too.. but with Gods love and yes some good acting I will get thru it. MY heart goes out to you.. I will pray for you..
  5. So alone

    This is technically my second christmas without my brother , he committed suicide last year 2 days after thanksgiving , so last year I was still in shock ,, this year is so hard I am in canada with my husbands family for the 3rd year in a row.. and this year I really need to be with my family,, My husbands family is great they just do not understand the loss they never met my brother.. I am just so so sad,, I am trying to keep my head up and say all the right things it is just so bloody hard, my hubby is not trying to ignore me but you know how it is when you are with your own family you talk about old times and christmas's past.. and all I want is to have that same companionship I need to talk about my brother and I have no one to do that with,, I hope everyone out there dealing with there grief today has a merry christmas, I am trying to do the same,, just hard...
  6. I am so angry and distraught and confused ,I don't know how much more I can take. a year and one month ago my oldest brother comitted sucicide , then in the last year my next to oldest brother has tried 3 times and now last night my oldest son tried.. I was just begining to come to grips with it all then this happened.. I truely feel like God is seeing how much pain one person can endure.. I can not understand how they could go through the same pain that I have went through then turn around and try to do the same thing.. I don't believe that Ronnie intended for the rest of us to follow his lead. But it feels like they are doing just that.. I don't know what to do. I just want to sit and cry but the tears will not come. My heart hurts. and I have been having chest pains from all the stress .. I just want to know why????? How???? I love them both but it seems like our love is not enough. I am right back to square one with my original post of how do I forgive.. The anger is back in full force. and I just can't take much more.. I mean how much is one person supposed to handle..?? If you can help me please do...
  7. Loss of a Sibling

    I just read your post to your brother's and my brother was not murdered but instead 1year ago on this past nov.25 he chose to kill himself and the pain of the last year has been so hard and I know what you mean about the pain of their birthdays Ronnies is Feb 2 ground hog day and I would always ask if he could see his shadow and of course he could He lived in fla.. so this is only my second of his birthdays without him and I have moved on with my life and started healing in our family . but I agree the peace has not came and I am ok with that. because I don't ever want anyone to forget how painfull this is .. So they never do the same.. I hope for you that at least the men responsible for your oldest brother's death is in jail.. I don't care what anyone says sudden death be it from an accident or murder or suicide , is harder to recover from ,due to a shock that you experience and the closer you were to the one who passed the deeper the shock value.. so just hang in there ,,we all are.. and try to continue making progress in your own life.. I am sure that is what both of your brother's would. want..
  8. how do i forgive

    please don't feel ashamed, we can not make the ones we love choose to stay a moment longer than they want to .. I wish we could. but as another person on here told me unfortunatly God gave us all free will. some of us choose to use that will to live and other's to move on.. Your mother was sick. and from what you said put up a long fight.. There is allways something we look back on and wonder could I have done this different but I think that in the moment we just do the best we can and that is all we can do..... again please do not feel ashamed... love your mother for the happy times and know she is better and out of all pain and suffering now..
  9. how do i forgive

    Your right we do need to help our loved ones who are unable to carry themselves through this pain, or we may end up at another funeral .That is why I did make the choice to go to the dinner, and I am so glad I did, Having my brother back and hearing him say I love you sissy, gives my heart hope that Yes I can cope with our other brothers sucicide.I will pray for your family and please pray for mine..
  10. how do i forgive

    I agree with you .. you should not have to cater to the needs of those unwilling to understand. I know I don't have to explain to you how it feels when you mention your loved one and people get that blank or worse yet the i feel so sorry for you look on there faces. I don't even think they realize it is there. But it makes me feel like I have a horrid disease and they don't want to catch it.. I wish they would just look up what I am going thru. there is so many resources and if they want to help they can just treat me like they would want to be treated if this had happened to them. I am glad to hear your brother and sister have mended thier fences . And I am sorry for your Loss. I will pray for you . I am sorry that your husbands family and you can not be there for each other. I know going thru this last year without my family was close to unbearable, My husband did the best he could but he didnt really know my brother that well. The ones I needed were my family the ones he and I had shared a bond with our whole lives.. I will pray that someday your husbands family comes to see, you need each other to heal . I know that since my living brother and I started talking again I have started to feel hope again, I wish the same for you ..
  11. Just wanted to send out a hug to you.. My Brother killed himself on Nov.25 of last year.So l know about the bitter sweet holidays. last years christmas was a blurr and this year my husband and I have agreed to celebrate privately .. I don't feel like trying to pretend the pain isn't still there. so I will just spend this one with my husband alone. Dealing with what I did not get to last year.. I will pray for you and your family Tell your parents that I am so sorry for there loss, I know as a mother of 3 I can not imagine what there level of pain is.. again Hugs to you and yours..Regina
  12. My Brother

    I just wanted to tell you that, I hope that you are doing ok this is a super hard time of year for all who grieve but with us it is even harder.. and for you even more so, I know that the pain for me eases some days and other's it is just like the day of the funeral. My birthday is on the 16th and My brother used to call me every year and sing happy birthday to me not last year or this or any other, but I know he is singing to me in heaven with and choir of angels beside. him. I have started writing letters to him and expressing my feelings no holds barred and it seems to help of course they go from angery to sad to loving from one sentence to the next ,Yet it seems to help.. try it.. I am online most of the time either on laptop or my phone if you ever need anything just email me.. terryregina@yahoo.com I may not have the answers God knows so many people on here have helped me so I would love the chance to pay it forward.. and remember to take care of yourself... Regina Greene
  13. how do i forgive

    Thank you all for your prayers and wonderful emails and replys to my original posts... I did go to thanksgiving dinner at my living brothers house. we went out alone and had a wonderful talk. He and I are working on rebuilding our lives .. I have ask him to promise me to not ever leave me the way Ronnie left us. (see how do i forgive) and since the dinner, I have received emails from his wife and children telling me that he is coming back around to the Man they all knew before our brother's death and they said it was because he no longer felt like he had lost me as well as Ronnie, Before I went there I prayed and ask God to heal our hearts. and He has begun that process. For Myself and my brother.. We still have a long way to go,and I know that we will never be the same ,yet I know that if I trust God he will repair our relationship. I still have my moments frequently of anger and disbelief that all this has happened, I just try to replace the anger with a good thought of my brother in life.. it helps it really does. I have many of you to thank for getting me thru what has been the hardest year of my life, as I said I had very few family members and my Husband to turn to. So thank you all for helping me make it thru and giving me the strength to trust God to heal my family,,,,hugs and prayers to all who have helped... Thank you (todays a good day) Regina Greene
  14. how do i forgive

    I am sorry about your friend ,, and yes this first year has been terrible. I have had lots of anger,and so much sadness.But your right about the happy memories.. if you have face book or my space I am on both and there are some wonderful pics of my wedding with my brother in them it was the last time we were together as a family. he actually was carring my wedding cake back in the house after the ceremony and he dropped it but caught my Knife and he turned around and looked at me and said Sissy I saved your Knife.. I was laughing so hard. and we got it in pics to see forever. it really was one of the funniest things I have ever seen, thank you for your thoughts . and I hope you get to see the pics .. he is adorable looking at me holding the cake plate and knife and the cake on the ground... He was a great man, and I am so glad I found Beyond Indigo It has helped me so much,,
  15. how do i forgive

    We have to just make it thru one day at a time.. thats what I have learned to do.. I know that everyone wishes for peace on earth this time of year . I to wish for that but most of all I wish for peace in the hearts of all those grieving for loved ones lost. and For peace in the hearts of those who think life is to hard...