When does my broken heart stop hurting

[Jen_Jen]

A little over a week ago I lost my husband, my best friend, my partner in crime. We have 3 young children still living at home. He was so young. How do I get over this pain that has assume me? I'm trying so hard to be strong for my kids. I cry myself to sleep and wake up with tears on my face. I'm so tired of people asking me how are you, or saying he's better off. I will never be the same and no he isn't better off, he would be better off here with us. I hate the person I am becoming I feel that I'm being mean, but everything everyone says or complains about is so trivial to me. I want to scream my husband is gone who cares about your overpriced gas or who cares about your menial problems. When does it ever not hurt this bad?

[ModKonnie]

Jen-Jen,

I am so very sorry about the loss of your dear husband. A week is not even the beginning of enough time to do anything but try to breathe and cry. Of course you are feeling every which way and can't probably put together a coherent thought! For now, just try to get through a little at a time. I know it doesn't help much now, but the pain will fade. Just try to concentrate on getting through the day. Let the rest wait til later. Do you have anyone to talk to? Friends? Family? Are you taking care of yourself?

 

We will be here with you,

 

ModKonnie

[Miriamhuerta60]

I understand some of what your feeling. I don't know if it necessarily gets easily but you learn to bare the pain a little more everyday. I miss my boyfriend everyday it's only been one month. I try to be positive and think of what he would feel or do in situations. I have my moments where I'm angry and want to just scream. You are not alone.

[ferida10]

Jen_Jen

I truly understand how you felt. The pain is definitely unbearable and everything is unbelievable. I've lost my husband who was also my best friend and my one true love. I was in a suicidal thought once. I pretended to be strong in front of all especially to my children but it led me to insanity so I prayed hard to God and I cried to him like a baby. I confessed all the pain I felt. I surrendered everything to Him and I still thanked Him for all the blessings He gave me inspite of my loss. I kept asking God to enlighten my mind and touch my heart everyday. So from that moment I'm no longer escaping the pain but instead I felt it and I embraced it until I was fully healed. I know we have different coping mechanism. All I can say is to feel the pain. If you want to cry then cry. If you want to scream then scream. If you want to talk about it and nobody's there to listen to you then talk to God about it because He listens and He can feel us hurting. He will never leave us. I wish I can be with you to hug you and tell you everything is going to be okay soon. Just be gentle to yourself. Take care and love yourself. I love you and God loves you.

[Lololynette]

Jen,

I am right here with you! I lost my husband suddenly on November 24th this year so almost 5 weeks ago. I am only 38 and he was hit on his motorcycle when someone pulled right in front of him. He died at the scene and he never had a chance. I am in such pain I am consumed and pray for my own death. My family has flown in to watch over me as I was honest about my thoughts on suicde. My hearts beating all strange and I can't image my long lonely life. I've loved him for so long now and we were so happy. I can't see my life without him and I don't want to. I am so sorry you are going through this too! People are insensitive and they can't understand that type of love. I am getting the same responses. You're young go make babies. Be positive and only four days after it happened a friend came by and was complaining about her man cooking dinner without her and how she wanted to make it and I too wanted to scream at her are you serious it's dinner! My husband is dead hit my an idiot driver who was 77 and apparently didn't have a license and shouldn't have been driving! I can't hear motorcycles or ambulances without breaking apart and again I pray for death

Lori

[ferida10]

Lololynette,

I truly understand how you feel now. My husband died through a motorcycle accident too. He was speeding but he has the right of way. Suddenly the eight-wheeler mixer was turning left. My husband tried to pull over but his body flew under the mixer truck and was run over. I can still remember the call I received telling me the news that he's dead. He didn't make it in the hospital. He was pronounced DOA. We were 10 years together and just had a 5 months old baby during his accident. I was still recovering from the birth of our baby because she was premature and undergone C- Section to survive the baby because she was an IUGR baby. Indeed she was a miracle baby and my husband was very proud of her progress.We even planned to set our wedding last August but everything has gone through the wind. Same like you, I thought of death for myself. It's a feeling that I don't want to wake up anymore because the pain is too much to handle. It's ripping out our hearts. So what I did, I joined this site. I seek God through this hardest moment I felt. I had invited lay ministers for a bible sharing in my house. I confessed my pain to God. I attended Church every Sunday with my children. At the same time, I surfed online about Near death experience, life after death, visitation dreams and spirituality. I've done this for almost eight months until I found love for God and myself. I found peace within my heart. I finally felt happy again which I thought I couldn't do anymore. I know you'll find it too. Just be strong and be gentle to yourself. Have faith in God. I'll pray God to touch your heart and fill it up with more love and enlighten your mind everyday. You may not know me or will never see me in person, but I'd like you to know that I care for you and that I love you. We are many in the same journey. Take care. Ferida

[shirin]

Hi

I'm on the same ordeal. Lost my husband tragically too. Went for surgery to take out two wisdom teeth n he couldn't get up. Been married 10 years too.me too is 38years old now.he wud have been 40 this year. Wiz two children

One is 10 n the other nearly eight now. Its so difficult to live wiz this pain. U should know you are not alone on this.