Members Lisa k Posted August 19, 2015 Members Report Share Posted August 19, 2015 Hi everyone, i'm new here never posted before.My mother died from lung cancer on 14th of july 2015.She was only 66.She was my best friend , my only friend. I took care of her and watched her die at home. I'm struggling to come to terms with it. I'm 41 years old , i've never married or had kids. I struggle with chronic anxiety and other mental health issues. I feel so desperately alone and just want to join her. I feel like i can't go on. The feeling of loss is unbearable . I'm sorry for everyone feeling grief and i wish you peace. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Bonitaellada Posted August 19, 2015 Members Report Share Posted August 19, 2015 Hi LisaI sm so Sorry for your loss. It has been only one month. What you are feeling is pretty much normal.My mom died 18 months ago and I still want to join her. They say time heals. I don't think so. Please know that you are not alone.Hugs, Bonita Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Fragrantcloud Posted August 19, 2015 Members Report Share Posted August 19, 2015 Hello Lisa K sorry for your loss!!! I know how you feel, I want to join my mum too. I am younger than you though (20) like the reply before me said people keep saying time heals but so far in three weeks it only seems to get worse. I hope you try like I am. I have a baby sister and my dad so I know I have to try but I know its hard. Have faith. Good luck and sorry for your loss. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members cindyjane Posted August 19, 2015 Members Report Share Posted August 19, 2015 Hugs Lisa....I am so sorry for your loss. It's been almost 2 years since my mom left us and 1 year since my dad also passed on. For me, the first few months was mostly shock and then trying to adjust to this overwhelming change in my daily life without them. As the days, weeks and months pass, for me it has gotten a little easier. The tears still come and the sadness hits but after a good cry in missing them I can see some uplifting things. Like having them for my parents, all of the love they had for their family, the wonderful times we spent together, the things they taught me throughout my life, being there for my siblings and I, and on and on. I can no longer look at these things and feel so heavy hearted. Instead, now I find myself feeling grateful for them. I guess you could say that the tears that I cry now are still in missing my mom and dad but they are also tears of gratefulness which makes it a little easier as time passes by. The loss of your mother is very recent so allow yourself some time to feeling your feelings, even though it may be painful. This is because of the deep love you have for her. My hope is that as time passes, the heaviness of your heart will also be lifted. God bless you and others who are having a hard time. take careCindy Jane Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Lisa k Posted August 20, 2015 Author Members Report Share Posted August 20, 2015 Hi Cindijane,thankyou for your kind words and to everyone else who replied.I'm glad i found this forum as i'm virtually alone. I have a brother 3 years older than myself that has schizophrenia. Both of us lived with my mum all our lives. my brother doesn't talk about anything with anyone. He struggles to show emotion and so do i alot. We are not what you'd call close as in we do not talk to each other about feelings . Many times through my mums illness i would explode into tears and my brother would walk past like nothing was wrong and never asked if i was ok. It's the nature of his illness and it's difficult at the best of times. He's not a bad person it's just how he is. My mother was an only child so there is no family on her side. My father walked out on us when i was a baby and was never a part of our lives. I met him when i was 26 for the first time he said he wanted to get to know us and promised to stick around but he never did. he has no idea my mum died and i wouldn't bother to tell him. I have no friends myself so i'm glad i found this forum because i've never felt so desparate and alone. so thankyou for your words sorry this is so long. All the best to you cindijane From Lisa K Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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