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Need some ways to cope with new woman around and being invisible


cookiebeh12

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My mom was only 40 and she passed towards the end of April in 2014. My aunt (her youngest sister) and my younger cousins started coming around to help out around the house. It wasn't bad at first, but a week after my mom was burried, my dad and aunt started dating. She slowly began doing less around the house and she began to get meaner. She came over every weekend and demanded my dads attention, and got mad when she didn't get it. So he took her out almost every weekend and if they didn't go out, they spent all day in his bedroom and I would be in charge of watching 5 other children. They don't listen to me, since I'm not much older than them. So if they break something, its my fault for not stopping them and if a fight breaks out its my fault for failing to prevent it. My aunt and my dad say terrible things about me n my siblings and it makes me really upset because my dad never did that. She told my dad to just abandon us because we don't need him n she needs him more. When she's around, my siblings and I don't eat, because if something goes missing she'll run to my dad and say something and he'll get mad and yell at us. So we only eat if she makes something or if I'm left in charge to make dinner. Sometimes, when she's mad at my dad, she'll fix her kids n my younger sister n my dad dinner n tell me and my brothers that we're on our own for food. She hasn't came in about a month, and I'm really glad, but I'm scared for her to come back because I know things will be way worse and her and my dad will be out all weekend. When she's around, its like I'm not there.

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Dear cookie,

I'm so sorry to hear that you have suffered such a loss at such a young age. For her children, a mother's love is like a "soft place to fall" and you have lost that love and support at such a young and important age. Please accept my most sincere condolence - I wish I could give you a hug right now.

Based on what you have written, you are dealing with some very complicated, adult problems. And, unfortunately it doesn't sound like your dad or your aunt are acting like very responsible adults at the moment. I would encourage you to find someone you can talk with... The mother of a friend, a teacher, a counsellor... Someone who can offer you some support and help you through this difficult time.

Hugs to you my dear!

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Am so sorry for your loss. You should go directly to some other relatives and tell them what's happening and ask for help. If your siblings are underage, pls go to the police. Their future and yours are in your own hands. You are a good person and the wings to shelter your younger siblings. Keep the family bonds bc that's happiness! they will be very thankful to you. As for your dad, u need to talk some sense to him. Don't abandon him bc he's still ur dad. If possible, move out and u can apply for government assistance. There's always brighter sides and people out there that are willing to help. Reach out and don't be a victim.

Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

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