Members sim-law Posted July 26, 2014 Members Report Share Posted July 26, 2014 Having a bad day.It took most of our lives to find each other and in a flash its all gone and I am left to grieve alone with images of what might have been filling my head. Sometimes I just cant stand it anymore.Questioning ExistenceWill enough tears ever fall to fill this voidwill there ever be so much painthat nothing hurts me anymoreas my soul criesthere is no end to sufferingas there is no reason for hopeheaven couldn’t wait for my lovebut it waits for mecan I still livedo I even want tois death the end of all hopethe end of all possibilitiesDoes my soulmate waitor is it human delusionwhy suffer without hopeand my soul cries.Sorry to be so depressing, I was always the cheerful optimist in my past life. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members llovern Posted July 26, 2014 Members Report Share Posted July 26, 2014 Sorry you were having a bad day. It's hard to be the cheerful optimist when your world goes dark. Your words express the hopelessness that most of us feel most of the time I think. However, I can say that as time passes, I experience more happy moments. The pain of loss lessens for a while and life becomes more bearable at those times. I hope you are having a better day today. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members HeyJude Posted July 29, 2014 Members Report Share Posted July 29, 2014 I am here to tell you that it really does get better. I'm at a year and a half and in the beginning all I wanted was to die and be with my love. I was sad, depressed, hopeless, dark. While I still miss my husband terribly and still have days where I cry, I promise you, it is going to get easier. Happiness will sneak back in. Sadness is replaced with happy memories. Tears turn to smiles. I can't say that this will happen for everybody but it is happening for me and I never thought it would. Bad days are always going to happen, just do your best to get through them. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members sim-law Posted August 3, 2014 Author Members Report Share Posted August 3, 2014 Another Saturday night Another bad day alone, just hope for peace. Expressed better here: "Fade To Black" Life, it seems, will fade away Drifting further every day Getting lost within myself Nothing matters, no one else I have lost the will to live Simply nothing more to give There is nothing more for me Need the end to set me free Things not what they used to be Missing one inside of me Deathly lost, this can't be real Cannot stand this hell I feel Emptiness is filling me To the point of agony Growing darkness taking dawn I was me, but now he's gone No one but me can save myself, but it's too late Now I can't think, think why I should even try Yesterday seems as though it never existed Death greets me warm, now I will just say goodbye Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members sim-law Posted August 3, 2014 Author Members Report Share Posted August 3, 2014 Listening to this is probably a mistake, I am looking for some more uplifting music, maybe ceilidh would be good. Any suggestions for spiritually and emotionally uplifting music would be gratefully received, my tastes are very eclectic. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members HeyJude Posted August 3, 2014 Members Report Share Posted August 3, 2014 I have yet to find any music that really lifts me up. I "feel" music and I think that those of us who do have more trouble listening to it than those who just hear it. Everything in my life is wrapped around music and it just brings back memories that are always sad for some reason. I do listen, don't get me wrong, but it always takes me to memories of Jerry...always. And it gets sad, even happy songs will make me sad. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members alwaysmrsfersch Posted August 4, 2014 Members Report Share Posted August 4, 2014 I can't really listen to any sort of music without crying, so I've taken to finding parodies of Disney songs. If you want a good laugh find the parody of "do you want to build a snowman?" Called "do you wanna hide a body?"somehow my four year old niece knows this song, she's had me laughing for days at it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Bobby Lee Posted August 11, 2014 Members Report Share Posted August 11, 2014 Very sorry for your loss. A word you used struck me right away, a word I find myself going back to" suffering". I've used it myself many times since my wife passed, it seems more appropriate or more accurate. It feels , to me anyway, that grieving is not a strong enough word for what this is, this specific pain. Best of luck. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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